SHOULD I THROW THEM AWAY OR KEEP THEM? ?

I'm a 20 year old guy..and for the past 10 years I haven't been happy with my life.. Family issues, personal issues,suicidal thoughts..etc. When I was 17 I started to write on my notebook kinda like a journal..I was reading them and they are a lil depressing and remind me of how boring and the not so good times in my life. I what to start over with my life I want to be positive and optimist and I'm really looking forward for a good future.(I also bought a new one) So my question is should I keep them or should I throw them away and start a with a new one?